Moving to Imago Dei's Eastside Campus

We had another gathering tonight for Imago Dei Community's Eastside Campus, which is launching slowly but surely. Pastor Eric Knox is leading us to the Hazelwood Neighborhood in East Portland. We are currently meeting monthly in a lecture hall in David Douglas High School.

God definitely made it clear to Jen and I that we are supposed to move back to East Portland after moving away to go to Ontario, Oregon and then to where we are now in SW Portland in order to find a solid teaching job for me. Now, since I have a secure job teaching at a private school in SW, we have the freedom to move anywhere we want (in other words, SW Portland is too expensive and we need to move somewhere cheaper and with more room for when our new baby is born, and besides, we miss the comforting Friday night sirens in East Portland too much). Lol

In all honesty, we really have a heart for East Portland and all the crap going on over there between it and Gresham. Before Nolan and Delaney existed, we were really enjoying starting the Glenfair Community Garden, which we helped our friends from Glenfair Church build from scratch. It was such an awesome way to get to know our neighbors and build community. We hope to do more of that in the future when we move back, including getting more involved with East Portland Neighborhood Office (EPNO) and whatever neighborhood association corresponds to wherever we end up living.

The leadership team for Imago Dei Eastside has a great heart for really wanting to help those who are already living their lives in East Portland without trying to change them into something they aren't. We want to build relationships and help them discover their assets and use those to their advantage in order to allow them to be successful with their immediate needs, and through that they will receive Jesus' love through us. We are partnering with SecondStories.org to learn more about how to build relationships and being WITH them rather than just doing things for them.

As for Sunday services, it is really up in the air right now. We need people to step up and volunteer in order to get a weekly service going. I will be leading the production of audio/video, slides, etc. while Jen will be working with the nursery and preschool kiddos. It is very strange to be in a small church type setting again, even smaller than when we were at Origins in Ontario. We definitely know this is where we want to be, since we want God to stretch us and use us to glorify His name in one of the most diverse, low-income, and neglected areas in the Portland area. God is already doing awesome things. We are just joining in!

Oh yeah... and we also still need to actually move there. Our lease ends in a few months, so, if anyone hears of any inexpensive 3-bedroom  houses or apartments for rent, we're hoping to find a place before our baby pops out in July! Hopefully by the end of June we'll be settling into a new place! Crazy changes ahead!! We are looking forward to where God is leading us. We are up for anything, good or bad... as long as we are loving God and loving others, we know we are on the right path!

The Real Reason I Became A Teacher

I did not become a teacher to only teach math.
I did not become a teacher to only teach science.
I did not become a teacher to only teach reading.
I did not become a teacher to only teach grammar.
I did not become a teacher to only teach spelling, writing, social studies, or anything academic.

I did not become a teacher to only teach things that really don't matter.
I realized the real reason I became a teacher this week...

For two weeks my students worked on skits to show how certain types of people need help from non-profit organizations like Neighborhood House. I also brought my students to serve at Neighborhood House, and I plan to take them back each of the other trimesters this school year. I put a fun video together, showing how the kids served and their excitement for helping others.

It hit me when my students presented the video of them serving in chapel to the K-5 students in our school. I started crying in the middle of the video (thankfully it was pitch dark in our auditorium, so it was a special moment without my students catching me crying!). Being in chapel wasn't why I became a teacher. I never thought I would be teaching mostly white, upper-class, Christian kids in private school. But God called me to something better than I had planned. He humbled me by whipping me into shape in Ontario, then put me in this place, which is perfect for my gifts and how me made me. Knowing how crappy teaching can be if one is not well prepared, God prepared me so I wouldn't get a big head and think I was the best thing since sliced bread.

I became a teacher to be an example to kids.
I became a teacher to show them what it looks like for a man to love Jesus.
I became a teacher to spread excitement about loving others.
I became a teacher to serve.

Memories

This blog has evolved quite a bit since I started it in 2006. I began writing as a single guy right out of college, forming my opinions about life, and growing in maturity (as if I ever really completely reach maturity!). My hope for the future is that it becomes something more.

My first posts here were about movies, politics, tv shows, and other silly things I don't care to post about as much anymore. As I deepened my theological beliefs, I connected it with the world around me as best as I could. I look back on those musings now and realize they were essential for growth and understanding the culture I was in.

The next phase of this blog transitioned into my engagement with Jen, getting married, and realizing the depth of my pride. This was definitely a time of adjustment as my selfishness was being displayed to my spouse every day. We didn't know where our future was headed as we moved from Seattle to Portland, didn't have solid jobs, and were at an all-time low on cash.

It was then that God put teaching on my heart. I worked at the YMCA doing after school care, and my desire to work in the classroom was overwhelming. I filled this blog with posts about funny kid quotes, educating others (including my most popular post about educating others about my birth defect, Poland Syndrome), my opinions (and Jen's) about all the crappy parenting we see, and how I planned to make a difference.

As I began working on my Masters degree, I started Riedlteach.com, blogged about children's books, shared what I was learning, and began teaching at a variety of public schools. I was confident in my God-given abilities to connect with my students, but was still just getting my feet wet. ...Fewer blog posts.

At home, Jen and I welcomed Nolan into the world. Balancing my first few of years teaching, being a husband, and being a father taught me to prioritize and learn. A lot. I realized that at that time of my life, blogging was just not going to happen. ...Even fewer posts.

Our rough experience in Ontario, Oregon, really put the last nail in the coffin for this blog. This post was sitting on the front page for a long time. God really has put our family through a lot these past few years. I'm glad, too. We trust in Him more because life isn't supposed to be easy.

Now, I'm realizing that in this next phase of life, I don't want to forget the good and bad memories my family is working through every day. I want to resurrect this blog and start sharing again. As the years fly by with a steady job and kids growing like weeds, it can easily slip away. I hope to use this blog as a way to record memories, share experiences, and look back on what is most important.

Remembering Ontario...

In May of 2012, I doubted my future as a teacher. Asking for help to survive the last month teaching a horribly disrespectful group of students, I wrote an email to all of the other teachers at Ontario Middle School. In the email, I told them about how my Teacher Appreciation Week went and how it pretty much summed up my entire year teaching there. I had already talked to certain teachers in person, but I also wanted to get advice from as many other teachers as possible, since I was considering leaving the teaching profession because of how crappy that year of teaching was. Being verbally abused by my students was not something I wanted to continue. A teacher can only handle so much cussing from students, throwing objects, suspensions, selfish attitudes, and disrespect before I realize that I might be better suited for another job elsewhere.

This is a snippet of what I wrote in that email:

"We all received an email from [our assistant principal], in which he stated, 'I hope at some point this week you felt appreciated.' Well, that very day I was called 'racist' by one student, 'idiot' by another, 'you're fucking stupid' from another, 'gay' from another, hit by a pencil, almost hit by a calculator, and not to mention all the usual ways I get disrespected by adolescents. At one point in the week, I did feel appreciated: I received a goody bag with my name on it that had candies in it, in addition to a granola bar I got in my mailbox. I put both of them on my chair behind my desk ...and guess what... THEY WERE STOLEN BY MY STUDENTS!"

My co-workers provided me with very helpful feedback. Most of them told me exactly what I needed to hear, supported me when I was struggling, and encouraged me to continue teaching in the future.

I realized that I learned a TON that year. Looking back, I knew that time of my life was God opening my eyes and humbling me to all the crap that goes on in this world. I needed to see how such a shitty job was actually a realistic representation of the every day lives that some of those students I taught go through day after day. I know now that because I took teaching so personally and wanted to improve, God had been preparing me for something better in the future.

Giving up when the times are tough is not the attitude that Jesus portrays for us in His exemplary life. He showed us that when the going gets tough, that's when we are in the best position to cry out to God and ask Him to help us see the bigger picture.

When I look back on Ontario now, 2.5 years later, I now see more positives than I see negatives. Even though that job was one of the most painful experiences of my life, I think about Ontario now as a time of growth. We had a great time spending time with friends from church, serving others in the community, walking Nolan in the stroller around the town, spending time together as a family at home, and learning about how God prunes us when we don't expect to be pruned. 

It's Been A While...

A whole lot has happened since our last post here on Riedlblog. We struggled through a miscarriage, left a horrible teaching job in Ontario, joyously discovered we were pregnant again, moved back to Portland, lived with the 'rents for the 2012 summer, settled into a new SW PDX apartment, started a new teaching position, celebrated our 5th wedding anniversary, welcomed Delaney into the world, partied in San Diego at Jen's brother's wedding, successfully finished a full year of teaching fifth grade, received a wonderful gift (a Zoo membership) from friends, spent this summer learning about animals and swimming at Grandma and Grandpa Riedl's, and are now, for the first time, on the brink of beginning a second year teaching at the same school. Many ups and downs were woven into the past 1.5 years.

Unfortunately, we have mostly bad memories from the time we spent in Ontario. We certainly don't regret going, however, because we know that God led us there in order to strengthen our trust in Him, humble us, and mature us. That was evident in the fact that the only aspect of living in Ontario that we found peace was in the church community that we were involved with there. God clearly worked through our great friends at Origins in order to help us through my painful job, our miscarriage, and being away from our friends and family in the Portland area. We look back on that time of pruning as a blessing from God.

Moving back to Portland without a job, I was thankfully offered one after my first interview at West Hills Christian School. We moved two blocks away from the school, so my commute is a 6-minute walk every day. Teaching 5th grade was a blast...much more fun than 8th grade. This fall, I will be back at the same school in the same position for the first time in my teaching career. Our entire family is looking forward to me not having to change schools and start all over again like the last few years. My hope is that I will finally be able to settle into my position and be able to hone my teaching skills into the future.

As for the family, God entrusted us with a super cute little baby girl named Delaney. Seven months ago, our lives changed drastically with the addition of family member #4. It has definitely required teamwork between the both of us in order to take care of a toddler and a newborn. I tip my hat to single parents...I don't know how they do it. It's amazing how less often Jen and I get a break from the kids. Our marriage has been tested now more than ever before. And now, as Nolan is learning to be intentionally defiant, we are learning how to be on the same page with parenting. It was easy when it was simply "Your turn to change his diaper." But now, we need to be consistent as we are feeling the weight of responsibility in how much influence we have on his future.

God is still pruning us. We are glad too, since life without struggle would be boring. The past has taught us many things (here and here). As we look to the future, and as we want our family to grow larger (even though we have no money for a bigger home or a larger car), we trust that God will be our immovable foundation. He is the centerpiece that our lives revolve around. This is His story, not ours. When we focus all of our energy on what is most important in life (loving God and loving others), then we can be at peace knowing that our Father is pleased.

Life Is Supposed To Be Hard

This past weekend our car tire was slashed and our living room window shattered while we were watching tv late at night. The lights were on and somebody actually had the balls to vandalize our home while we were awake! Of course we didn't run outside immediately to see who it was, so we weren't sure if it was random vandalism or not. Since the window was broken right by our ears, it was incredibly loud. The scene from Remember the Titans flashed through my mind, where Denzel Washington's character whipped out his shotgun to protect his family when a brick came through his window. Although I had no shotgun to pull out, I still felt the same sense of duty to protect Jen and Nolan.

Just a few minutes ago Nolan was crying in his room and was having a hard time putting himself down for a nap. I went in, picked him up, and he immediately snuggled on my shoulder, under my chin, and fell asleep. Feeling the trust and the love that he shows me when I am caring for him gives me a new perspective when bad stuff happens like broken windows and flat tires. I see now that I love him even more when I think something might happen to him. What if it had been his window that was vandalized? Now that he is walking faster than we can blink, I think about the possibilities of him taking a journey out into the street and the dangers beyond our reach. If we lived in a boringly safe neighborhood, would I focus more on how annoying it is when he wakes up at night or would I focus more on how much I love him and get the privilege of putting him to sleep? He is safe in my arms. He is a happy, cuddly boy. Do I love Nolan more when there is more of a threat that something might happen to him?

Jen and I rarely fight when we are dealing with things like this. If anything, a broken window and a slashed tire brings us closer together. We usually fight when we are bored and tired with life. When it's the same old same old stuff going on every day every week, we find flaws and faults in the other person. But when we become fearful of something beyond our control, then we hold each other close. When I feel the need to protect Jen, I immediately see her as my beautiful bride who needs rescuing. My desire is to see her safe and lovely. Do I love Jen more when there is more of a threat that something might happen to her?

Life is supposed to be hard. Without struggle and obstacles, we would never grow. Without being pruned, we would never stretch our branches further and never produce better fruit. We must not see these hard times as something negative, but as something positive that builds us up and matures us.

The Lord is the stronghold of my life and He is my light. When life is hard and bad things happen, Whom shall I fear?

Jehovah Jireh

"The Lord will provide" is what Jehovah Jireh means. Sometimes it is difficult to refer to God as Jehovah Jireh, however. Does He really provide for us? Or do we provide for ourselves?

39 days ago, Jen and I experienced something that has given us assurance to know that God should definitely be called Jehovah Jireh. He provides for us.

Our whole marriage has been a struggle financially. We moved to Portland from Seattle after being married only six months. Jen worked low wages and I found minimum wage work as we slowly used up our savings. I eventually took out loans and went back to school to get my masters degree in teaching. This was bad timing to be looking for a teaching position, as most school districts were making budget cuts and laying off teachers. I was eventually offered a full-time job teaching in Ontario, Oregon, so we moved our little family of three to the small town on the border to Idaho.

We thought it would be easier to pay the bills with my new teaching position, but we were wrong. We both wanted Jen to work at home raising Nolan, but didn't have any experience with the strain of having only one spouse bring home an income. The money we had saved when we were both working disappeared in our move from Portland and with each month of additional bills. We worked hard to be responsible and tried our best to cut expenses, rarely going out to eat and even starting to coupon with every trip to the grocery store. But we still were losing money each month.

The point of me writing all of this is about money. ...Duh... Not about how little we have, but about how much we were giving away. Over the past four years of marriage, we kept telling each other that we didn't have enough money to pay bills and also give 10% tithe or offering to church. So we didn't give. Well, not much. Maybe 10 bucks a month or something ridiculously convenient for us. We kept telling ourselves that because we didn't have enough money, we could give our time instead. So we served. We spent a lot of our time serving in the children's ministry instead of giving money.

This leads me to what happened 39 days ago. We are sitting with a cranky, fidgety Nolan on Sunday morning listening to our pastor's message about money. He starts talking about how the church budget had literally run dry. He told us, like so many times we've heard before, that God will provide the money even though we had not been meeting the monthly budgets to pay the church bills.

Up until this point, Jen and I both wanted to tithe enough for it to be giving Him the opportunity to provide for us. We wanted to actually trust God rather than just trying to make ends meet on our own. And we were in no position to do this. The minimum payments on our student loans were almost 50% of our monthly bills. Thinking about this statistic, I knew that we didn't have much hope for fixing this problem ourselves. I certainly knew I didn't want Jen to go back to work and have to put Nolan in daycare. We wanted to trust God with our finances for the first time in our lives. We didn't even have to discuss it...after the service, we both had the same conviction to give 10% of our income to the church, even when there was no way we could afford it. We were trusting that God would do something.

It only took 24 hours for God to work! The next day I heard from a friend about a plan that Obama was trying to pass that helped out graduates who are burdened by paying off their student loans. After doing a little research, I found out that this was called the Income-Based Repayment Plan and only certain people qualify for it. Jen and I looked into it, learned that we do in fact qualify, and stayed up late that night applying for the plan together.

While we would have likely discovered the repayment plan eventually, even without tithing 10%, we are certain that it was more than just a coincidence in timing. Right after we both decided to go out on a limb and be faithful to God with our finances, He answered our prayer quickly and revealed His faithfulness to us. We were guided to a place where we were not feeling the burden of bills that has weighed us down since getting married.

And two days ago, on my last day of school before winter break, I get a call from a lady at Home Depot telling me that a man came in to anonymously buy us a new washing machine. Our current washing machine has been leaking and slowly dying, and apparently someone we know who referred to himself as "Santa" wanted to be extremely generous and buy us a new one! Jen thought it was a joke at first, but we went in to the store to confirm the order and have it shipped to our apartment. We were racking our brains trying to think of who it was that could have done this for us, but then we stepped back and realized that we already knew who "Santa" was. It was God.

God has provided so many things in our lives, even when we don't even realize it. This Christmas season has been extremely special because God made it clear to us that He is the one giving us gifts...not just at this time of year, but all day, every day. Every good and perfect gift comes from Him, and it was especially clear to us here. We will always look back on this time as evidence that God is at work in our lives. He is Jehovah Jireh and we can only respond by giving up our lives (which includes our money) to serve and love others.

My Daily Battle With Poland Syndrome

Many people have commented on my previous post (I Have Poland Syndrome) that they admire my courage and bravery in sharing my birth defect with the world. They appreciate that I look on the bright side and love life, being confident that God made me this way for a reason.

Well, I want to let you in on a little secret... I'm not courageous. I'm not brave.

I'm self-conscious.

Now, some of you might think that I am courageous relative to others that have Poland Syndrome. Others with this birth defect are afraid to even tell their closest friends that they have a misshapen body and a figure that would get stares from people at the pool or beach. That may be true, but it is hiding the whole truth.

The reality is that all of my family and friends often forget that I even have Poland Syndrome. They thought it was interesting at first, and now they don't even notice it. It is not who I am, it's just what's under my shirt.

The real battle is with my own self-image. I still see my one-sided chest every morning. Every day I see my puny right bicep and thin arm. When I have my shirt off at the pool, I often intentionally put my towel over my right shoulder in order to hide my missing right pec muscle. When I pose in photos, I often intentionally stand on the left side of people to show off my left bicep rather than exposing my right. These are things I think about.

The first photo above was taken four years ago when we moved to Portland. I have this photo in a frame by my desk at work and every time I look at it, it reminds me how I purposefully stood that way to hide my right arm. I like the way I look in it because it shows off my left bicep and pec muscle.

The second photo was taken about a month ago. In this photo, I immediately look at my right arm and see how small it looks. Many would say "Aaron, it doesn't look small. It's not a big deal," but it looks small to me. I struggle with focusing on all of the joys in the photo. I'm not ignoring my beautiful wife and cute son on a beautiful day at the pumpkin patch, it's just that my eyes keep panning down to my arm.

This is the battle of self-image that I struggle with. It's not eating me up inside or anything. I live a pretty normal life. Most of my time is spent thinking about work and my loving family that I come home to every day. But those other times of the day when I am daydreaming or looking at photos, I see a man who is not as physically attractive as I would like to be.

The life-long battle of being self-conscious is one that will never end. I am constantly fighting these self-image issues and accepting the fact that I am different. Some days I love being different, while other days I wish I had a normal chest and two normal arms. It's a battle that I don't think I'll ever win... but I don't ever plan on losing the battle either.

God tells us in the Bible that although I want to do good and think good thoughts, evil is right there with me. The battle of my flesh is raging with what I know God wants: He wants me to focus on the love that Jesus covers us with...no matter what we look like. My body will eventually waste away and die, and it is what's in my heart and soul that counts. Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ!


Related posts:
I Have Poland Syndrome
My Tattoo
Will My Child Have Poland Syndrome?

Reflecting on God's Faithfulness

I was hunched over, face on the floor, crying out to God. Two and a half months ago, at the beginning of the school year, I was alone. I moved here to Ontario, Oregon, without my wife and son. My evenings were excruciatingly lonely and filling with worries about what the middle schoolers might do to me the following day.

Each night I had to put together sad, pathetic meals with only plastic silverware and paper plates. After living in a comfortable motel for a week with a cozy bed, I moved into an apartment with no furniture and empty cupboards.

I couldn't wait for my family to join me.

Now, after surviving one quarter as a full-time middle school math teacher in the poorest county in Oregon, I can see God's faithfulness. At the time, I felt like I would never get through the stress and pain of being a new teacher in a new school in a small town far away from the city I know so well. I'm currently feeling relief as I am beginning to get into a comfortable rhythm as a teacher. Tonight I ate a warm, delicious meal cooked by my beautiful wife. We have also been crawling around on the floor, playing with my cute son.

Even though life feels much better now, we are still experiencing stress and pain. I still work 65+ hour weeks as a new teacher. It's difficult to keep from thinking about anything other than solving for x and trying to figure out who is throwing the damn paper airplanes in class. I can't spend as much time with my family even when I know that I need to. Life is still really hard right now.

Thankfully, I look back on how God was faithful to me when I was hunched over, alone, crying on the floor of my empty apartment. He brought me my family and a warm meal. And he will do it again. There is a lot to look forward to.

Interviewed by Ontario's Newspaper

I was recently interviewed by a reporter from Ontario's local newspaper. It was fun! Click here to read about it.

Four new Nolan videos

Here are four new videos of Nolan, since we have been in Ontario. Enjoy!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mahiag5p-qU


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V-O0LEvxpVY


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zsa0RNdzhlo


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OqXZZf0h3o8

Moving to Ontario, Oregon

A week ago, I drove approximately 360 miles and 6.5 hours through the Columbia River Gorge, over the Blue Mountains, and across the dry high desert to the small town of Ontario, Oregon. It is right on the border of Idaho and the last stop on I-84 before crossing over the Snake River. There are only about 12,000 people living in the city, and I accepted an 8th grade math teaching position at their only middle school. I'm pumped!

Ontario Middle School is filled with staff who are so welcoming and willing to help me out. I have had so many people offer me a place to stay, to drive me around, and advice about the town. I have felt nothing but comfort in my new position, and I can't wait to meet my students! There are many positive things that seem to be happening in the district. There is construction on new buildings at the middle school and the high school, so it is clear to me that the kids have people who really care about them.

My home for the past week has been the friendly neighborhood Motel 6. It has been a nice place to relax while searching for a rental in the area. I ended up finding a great place in the north end of Ontario and plan on moving my small pile of belongings in tomorrow. The funny thing is that some of the people from my school have told me that it is the "bad" part of town. With drugs, drive-bys, and stabbings. Stuff like that. My immediate thought was, "Hey! It's just like home in East Portland!" After riding my bike all over the city, it really doesn't seem that bad to me. And besides, I believe that if there is something wrong with a neighborhood, you need to be the change you want to see there (I think that's a quote from somebody famous). I talked to Jen about it and we both like the idea of living in an area where we can be a positive influence, rather than just fleeing to live where nobody is struggling to get by. After just a week of being here, it seems to me that there is a great need in this city. There is a need for unity and integration between neighborhoods and communities. I really hope to help Ontario as a teacher and now as a resident.

My loving wife showed her complete dedication to me by being willing to move across the entire state, away from friends and family to a small town where we know absolutely no one. It has been very difficult being away from her and Nolan, but thankfully due to the internet and the new Google+ Hangouts (see pic), Jen's beautiful smile and Nolan's adorable noises are just a few clicks away on video chat. They will be joining me in just a couple short weeks, and Portland will be in our rear view mirror.

I believe we have a great opportunity to make a difference in the city of Ontario. There are many people here that are hurting, and I hope that God will use the Riedl family in a way that pleases Him.