How can I fit in a social life? Well, that's easy...I can't. At least, not a very healthy one. My good friend Patrick has been so patient with me as I rarely hang out with him anymore. My family over on the westside probably has forgotten what I look like by now. And my wife...well, let's talk about her.
My marriage is affected by my work. That's a given. But the question is, how will it be affected? I am the person that influences Jen's attitude more than anyone in her life. It is crucial that I be diligent in making time for her and focusing my little free time on her and only her. Doing the dishes for her before she gets home surprises her and lets her know that I am thinking about her. Surprising her with flowers at work by riding TriMet for 3 hours in between classes is totally worth it. And giving her a back rub not only helps her feel loved, but also helps me avoid carpal tunnel!
I can see why marriages fall apart so easily when job hours or demands increase. It's tough being in a relationship that requires so much focus and time when all of that focus and time is expected to go into my work.
But overall, we are trying our best to focus on God in this marriage and constantly trying to be servants to Him and to each other. And thankfully, that is keeping us relatively stable.
P.S. - Patrick inspired me to write this post. :-) Thanks man!
I had the same problem when I was in graduate school (many years ago!).
ReplyDeleteI finally set a policy that I would put the books away at dinner-time on Friday and not open them again until mid-afternoon on Sunday -- except, of course, the week before finals and finals week itself.
Those weekend hours were reserved for spending time with my hubby. Doing that, made a significant difference in our relationship.